THE BURGLAR WITH VERTIGO
I had a burglar who suffered from vertigo, and as I chased him over wet slippery roof-tops in
the dark, he climbed ever higher to get away from me. Eventually he could go no further and
finished up on top of a narrow brick parapet three floors up, with a sheer drop on one side,
and a sloping slate roof on the other. I was now on a twelve inch parapet at the bottom of this
wet sloping roof, still with a two storey drop behind me, and what that damned burglar didn't
know is that I also have an unreasonable fear of heights.
I called for him to come down slowly spread eagled, lifting slates where possible to get a grip, but he was frozen with fear and could not move. I had no alternative but to climb to him, so I did so slowly, spread eagled trying to lift slates for a grip. To make matters worse it started to rain again, and he moved causing that ancient crumbling brickwork to loosen four bricks, which came sliding down straight at me. I couldn't protect my head and face by letting go of my precarious hold, and all four hit me causing my face and scalp to bleed profusely. I eventually got to him, and he was in a dreadful state of fear. Luckily my wireless operator in the car had seen our predicament and called the fire brigade.
Both the prisoner and yours truly reached the ground in safety, but when my two car crew saw my blood they thought he had assaulted me, and I had to get between them and the poor prisoner, telling them that it had been a pure accident.
That young man was in enough trouble.